Memo at Midnight: How to really help someone in pain

Sometimes, all a person really needs is another person to listen and accept them.

Remember how you felt when you were at the lowest point in your life?? Exhausted, hopeless and maybe even worthless, like dust floating around in the street…. untethered to anything sane or concrete.

Most of us find ways to snap out of this state of mind and feel better. For others it may be more difficult. It may take more time. Why??

We are all unique. Two people may suffer from similar issues but they can still be different when it comes to how they deal with those issues.

Sometimes all a person really needs is another person to listen and accept them.

A mistake I see that gets made all the time by those of us who are trying to be helpful is to expect what has worked for us to work for other people, too. We may even get annoyed that other people aren’t following our brilliant and “expert” advice.

All we can really do is make our most well-intentioned suggestions and then hope for the best. That’s it. No one likes to be forced to do anything they don’t want to do and the way we go about solving a problem will be tainted by a myriad of life experiences, both good and bad.

And remember, sometimes all a person really needs is another person to listen and accept them.

Memo at midnight: For those hurting right now…

Memo at midnight: Love the world, beware the lion


  1. Great advice. JoAnn. Usually, the best help we can offer is just to listen.

    Too often, we let our egos cloud our judgment, particularly when we fancy ourselves as the “savior” As you mention, this leads to frustration that the problem persists, and even resentment that our ideas aren’t received in grateful awe.

    The last thing someone in jeopardy needs is an overbearing busybody. Best to get over ourselves.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This is such a wonderful post! Everybody is different and when you’re feeling not well, it is very personal. We can comfort each other and find recognition in stories of others but we’ll need to find out for ourselves what works in our life.

    Liked by 2 people

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